“Strong Men Retain Riches,” Women Shall Be “Keepers At Home”
Taking care of a responsibility in bread winning and homemaking without succumbing to materialism and greed.
No one has to teach us to be lazy and avoid responsibility. We come with that tendency. Many of us had parents who put forth effort to train us to overcome our aversion to work. This helps, but does not cure our nature.
Work is one of our Creator’s gifts to mankind. Even before the Fall of man, God told Adam to dress and keep the garden. The triune Godhead works in the world constantly (John 5:17; Colossians 1:17).
Entitlement, the feeling or belief that one deserves to be given something, such as special privileges, is a part of the human nature. We can be very grieved if we have to fit in and do our part. Other people’s clutter annoys us, our own somehow looks homey.
Being irresponsible, or lacking a sense of responsibility, is a twin to entitlement. We can walk right by duties and not notice them, unless it is something assigned to someone else to do.
When two selfish people marry they are in for major adjustment. Becoming married is a major step into the adult world. The privilege of living as husband and wife carries the responsibility to make it work. Weeds in the garden, dirt in the basement, hinges that need to be oiled, bills that need to be paid, etc. are all things that will not take care of themselves.
The Bible teaches it is a virtue to take responsibility willingly. If we find it in our hand to do, let us do it with all our might! Fathers, don’t complain and/or avoid the chores or earning a living for the family. Mothers, keep your house tidy and make sure meals are prepared for the family on time. The work will help you keep your mind where it needs to be, off yourself and on your family. This is your calling and you will find satisfaction in what you do for others.
But it all has to do with balance. There also comes a time to be satisfied, to stop and enjoy life. This lesson also explores the virtue of contentment.
And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men. Colossians 3:23
One generation should teach the next how to take their place in responsible family living. Modern ideas are often inroads from Satan through a godless society.
The older women should teach the younger women. Grandma had a practical head about how to do her work, that children should be disciplined so they don’t keep parents from their tasks, and how children can be taught to help in the work. Nowadays, grandma is pushed aside. She can hardly keep up with modern technology, so she is regarded as quaint and her ideas as being out of date.
Let’s examine some of the ways we now look to experts. We have been convinced that we should have smaller families so each child can have more of their parent’s time and resources. Supposedly smaller families are happier. One of the repercussions of this is that siblings don’t condition each other nearly like they did in large families. Parents do have more time to pursue interests outside the home, but the children expect the world should revolve around them. They believe parents exist to serve them. That raises their selfishness levels.
Seeing the obvious evidence of their selfishness, then we need to consult experts who in turn treat our children with toxic medications. Experts tell us that disciplining a child with corporal punishment teaches a child to use violence to get his way. The fact is that violence is inherent in the child’s nature. Corporal punishment is the only way to deliver a child from himself.
God’s plan of sending children and how children should be disciplined so they do not disturb home life is the way our godly grandparents understood. Their wisdom, acquired by experience and years of observation, should be highly treasured, not shoved aside.
God created husband and wife to serve as a team, each taking his role in unselfish service for the family.
Godly women are to be obedient to their own husbands. This indicates a mutual dependency upon each other. The husband learns of the wife’s needs and challenges as she seeks his counsel. He gives direction to these issues. She listens and is obedient. More help is needed. He steps into the challenge to assist her. This is the teamwork God is looking for.
Many a couple gets married and seemingly before they know it are carrying the load of a half dozen or more children. The load increased one child at a time (usually), so gradually that they can hardly believe they are able to carry a load that at one time would have staggered their imagination.
It works because each one supplies what is needed for the other. The husband protects his wife, brings home the financial resources needed, and gives his wife the counsel she needs to keep carrying her load. The wife, on the other hand, rises early and provides meals; she guides the children to do their part in their natural care of food and clothing. She provides the cheer and affection that are needed to keep the family functioning smoothly. She is taught to think soberly. This word means she is helped to have disciplined thinking. She chooses to see her work from an eternal perspective. She chooses to do what she knows she should do, not what she feels like doing. And she doesn’t have a mother (or grandmother) who is pitying her for the work she has to carry. Instead they are telling her, “You can do it. We did it with God’s help and you can too.”
Having a family of many children places a heavy load upon a husband and wife. When the parents have a vision of eternity and the enablement of God upon them, this teamwork can serve a vital role in the kingdom of heaven.
Is there such a thing as accepting that we now have more technology but we should still view our calling and responsibility as our forefathers did? Can we not see that while children bring financial responsibility and management, each “mouth” comes with “two hands”? We have dishwashers and automatic wash machines now, do we really need to follow the world’s thinking on family size?
People in the world with temporal goals make tremendous sacrifices for a temporary honor. Athletes spend grueling hours of exercise and training for a corruptible crown. Business executives spend hours away from home or traveling in order to climb a corporate ladder. Police step into the line of fire because they consider it their duty. Should not we who see eternity as our goal and souls as the most important asset of all be willing to serve a family’s needs without grumbling and complaining? Don’t we have the greatest and most worthwhile goal?
Slothfulness, self-pity, and procrastination drain a parent of energy far more than honest service and creativity.
The world believes in their pleasure seeking so they heap pity on “stay-at-home-moms” and tied-down dads. Will we buy into that mindset? Will we believe we have to go on shopping excursions, or mini-honeymoons, etc. in order to have fulfillment in life?
Or will we choose to believe the truth; that we will find the greatest fulfillment in life only when we are living our lives for our Creator’s purpose? When we tell ourselves that we don’t have enough energy for our work, then we won’t have the energy. When we feel sorry for ourselves, we reap a harvest of depression. When we push off our least desirable chores, then each work staring us in the face looks more difficult than the one we just did. Why not tackle our least desirable tasks first? Then we can reward ourselves with what we like to do.
Parents, life is not a playground. It is a battlefield. Step into the task as a couple linked together with God to reap eternal reward. He has promised He will never leave us nor forsake us.
Children should be welcomed in their efforts to assist in helping in the family, given age appropriate responsibilities, be taught to do the work brought of normal living and help care for younger siblings. It seems there are two stages in a child’s life regarding helping with work. At an early stage when they are too young to help, they want to help. They try and only get in the way.
Later when they could help they have developed an aversion to it. Parents need to go against their own natural tendencies and welcome a child in his efforts to please. God has placed this nature in a child, and it should be encouraged. It is amazing how many things a young preschooler can do if parents take the time to show them how and reward them for their contribution. This helps win a child’s heart to his parents. Later in the child’s development, for his own personal satisfaction and well-being, he must be shown how to do his work and given a vision of the rewards for doing it well. Parents will need to follow through to make sure the chores are kept after. This is where the “stitch in time” proverb fits in. It takes longer to train the child as your delegate, but in the long run, his training will serve to give you more time.
Fathers should pursue vocations that complement family life and do their part in helping manage the family.
Our present vocational structure often takes fathers away from home for the greater part of their waking hours. If fathers are flexible and mothers are willing to live on a lower income, there are times when home based or shop based businesses can be developed. (We do not want to rule out the family farm, but when farms become mega-businesses, have we really gained anything with a home based business?) The advantages of dad working at home or with his children cannot be overemphasized. Granted of course that dad has come to rest with making a simple income for the family. If his heart is motivated by greed, there will be no rest for him or his family regardless where he works.
When husband and wife put God first and diligently serve Him in what He chooses for their lot, God can open the windows of heaven and give them abundance for their needs. God wants to partner with parents in their earthly sojourn.
(Verses To Read)
Titus 2:3 -5
A Little Slumber...
Godliness With Contentment